Tuesday, 2 August 2016

My mood, my decision

Woke up at 7.00. It is impossible to forget your child's birthday and even if you have a not so great memory, they would not let you forget it. As a matter of fact, the countdown started a month ago. 
So it's going to be a tea party tomorrow. I have stepped down from lunch and dinner parties- age is catching up, but spirits aren't. 

I started baking, in the middle of my sleep. Some 50 cookies etc. Baking is known to be a therapeutical activity. I think it is the stimulation of the senses that makes it one of those 'peace giving' hobbies. I can compare it to a workout in the gym, as ironic as it sounds. In my case something that gives me peace often starts with it giving me a fair bit of stress. I start with acknowledging unpleasanteries and then watch the process gradually getting churned into a 'not so bad' phase and finally the 'life is good' and some days even, 'wow! hasn't been better'. You would laugh if you saw me walk out of the gym like a Jane Fonda's avatar with a huge halo of the sweet smell of accomplishment! Only I can see it, others just find me ridiculous wearing my workout gear and struggling with the ice cream melting on my hands- clumsy!

During the baking process, I went through a few thoughts, some from past, some of the present and some of the future and hold it... some from my grandchildren's future. Mind you, it's a 11 year old we will be celebrating tomorrow. That's basically how far my thoughts can travel. (I already know how all my jewelry will be distributed between my daughter and son.)

In case you haven't noticed, it is always a bit easier to manage the positivities than negativities. I have read Rhonda Byrne's books and strive after positive thinking, magical changes and gratitude. But, I AM A HUMAN BEING! I cannot help think negative, worry and stress. I have to just accept it and write my own edition of positive thinking. The one that suits me, one that is tailor- made for me and my personality. Worries and stress are nothing that can be shrugged away with a fly smasher. I believe that even if I succeed in doing it, I have possibly kicked it away, like the dirty laundry one hides somewhere out of sight, but eventually needs to take care of. 

My friends, I am trying to tell you here that I am no 'wise woman' when it comes to worry and stress management. My strategy works for me anyhow. I know that at the end of the day none of these bookwrights will come to my escape to solve my tensions and problems. It will be Me, the tailor-made me. 
My strategy to process it, deal with it in the right proportion works for me, at least most of the times. The one mantra I never forget is - what proportion of my everyday energy would it take, or rightly said, am I ready to let it take. 

Today, I had to deal with it. I did and I am a content person right now. I did not let it take the joy of my daughter turning 11, to fix her party, to make her happy. 
Countless number of times she came to me, as clumsy as her mom, she made the baking a bit of a hassle, but she kissed me and told me how thankful she was and how much she loves me. 
When the 3 of the family made that 'mmmm' sound after tasting the cookies, the feeling was indescribable. 
I am going to live with it for the rest of the day. One day at a time. Tomorrow's proportions will be made tomorrow. 

Mood- from a low to a major high
Lesson- I decide my mood- no one else!
My question to you- What is your strategy?




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