Listening to Bossa Marley, just ironed a ton of clothes and then the thought struck me. Bossa Marley, not an appreciated choice of music at home and ironing clothes is an old habit. Is there anyone else who irons towels and underwear?
This Friday I was meant to be ground support for Brothers Westberg at the summer house. They were to repair the roof and I were to be inspiring, cheer them, serve chilled beer and make some food that would reenergize them. That is totally my interpretation, a volunteer work and a perfect weekend. Came home after work with the migraine just conceived and in a matter of an hour, my head was in labour pain, the vomits were building up and I managed to throw up the first time in presence of Martin- first one of the nine. All of you who have migraine know exactly what I am talking about and those of you who don't might think I am exaggerating, but I have no reasons.
My staying back had nothing to do with a secret affair or My Time- it was as genuine as it gets. Usually I am a fighter, throw myself in, but this one time, the idea of 2 hours cruise with people sympathizing over a drunk throwing up wife just was not meant to be.
So Friday night, me and my cat Lexie, who btw took great care of me, just managed a few hours of sleep. Lexie likes to keep her distance from me usually and this night she slept 20 cm from me.
Saturday was a long phone talk with this person I love, ( a woman and no secret affairs). Perfect timing- she was home alone, me too and we talked for at least 3 hours. A cousin called up later and voila! we decided to go to Hamam- just like that. It was like meant to be, she felt for it, my migraine hangover couldn't have asked for more and the place had a slot. So, spa, lunch and home alone- again. Episodes of Modern Family, then some Bollywood film. No dinner- I guess Mr Migraine did not want to be left completely alone. Great sleep, Lexie moved 1 meter away after making a diagnosis that I was better now and decent distance can be maintained.
Woke up, another uninterrupted Bolly film. I don't know why but I can feel quite guilty watching these films when the rest of the non Hindi speaking family is around- like I am taking their time away from them. The best was to be able to cry without Martin making the 'awwww' sound when he sees my red nose, and tears refusing to flow.
All this time I kept talking to the kids, son is off in a town I haven't learnt the name of for a tournament. I kept talking to Martin who was worried, a bit guilty, happy, in pain from the hard labour! Yeah, tell me about it.
They are all on their way home now and I am pepped up. I just was told by a friend whom I shared my weekend story with that I got some me time. I never liked that expression when I read about it and heard everyone talking about it. Like, being a mom, wife, employee, friend is a job and not ' me'. I am Me and I do whatever I want, I do what is expected of me but it is at the end of the day my limbs controlled by my nervous system that do the chores. There is no boss over me making me do what I do!
I have 'Me time' 24 hours in the day. And I am 'me'. I loved the spa, loved the films and loved sleeping in the middle of the bed. But I am right now loving the fact that I am living with people, under a life situation where I can be 'Me'. So here I am, waiting for the parts of me to get back.
Question- Are you yourself or have you or have you not acknowledged it yet?
Mood- happy, love where I am
Lesson- Acknowledgement of choices in life